As of next week, I will no longer be identifying as a member of the social group generally referred to as "Hipster." I have accepted a position as a middle-ranking social hub and B-plus-list invitee in the New York WASPy Prep circle. While I am very saddened to be leaving Hipsterdom, particularly the glasses and the comfortable sneakers, I am very excited about my new social opportunity, including the LASIK,the Manolo Blahniks, and my upcoming nosejob and conversion to Episcopalianism.
Once I get settled in my new life, I will be sure to update you with my new contact information. Please note that my new cell phone will be unable to make calls to or receive calls from any New York area code that is not Manhattan, and is likely to deliver a somewhat painful shock if the area code in question is Brooklyn. I'm not sure of my new address just yet, but I can tell you for sure that it will be on the
Apologies to those of you who are Jewish, black, or straight-acting gay - it was really lovely knowing you. Watch the mail for a heartfelt letter of thanks and goodbye, written on my new Crane's stationery. For those of you who are white and protestant, give me a call sometime and we'll go to the club and watch our fiances play golf.