i didn't post yesterday, and yet my blog's traffic still spiked to the head-exploding number of Somewhere Over 100. so i checked out sitemeter to find out why, and apparently the astonishing majority of these visitors were doing google image searches for words like "pea" and "pe" and "peac" and this led them to find an image of a peace sign that i used on an old old old post, which has somehow managed to lose the image anyway. tres wtf.

anyway i'm going to pretend that's not true, and convince myself that literally hundreds of people per day think i am brilliant and witty. even if i do come up with inane arbitrage schemes which are unlikely to pay out.

speaking of paying out, the brilliant and witty person i was mentioning in the above paragraph is going to be in las vegas (where she has never been, and about which she is feeling sort of nervous) for a couple of days starting tomorrow, and has no guarantee of internet access. undoubtedly the city of sin will provide me with rich fodder: fat tourists, skinny unattractive tourists, and the fun & foibles of legalized addictive behaviors all seem like likely targets. then again, i promised to make fun of europe when i spent a week in spain, and all i managed to do was get caught in a terrorist attack.

update: some more housekeeping - i've added a few new & excited folks to my links sidebar. one of them promised that if i added him, he would consider me a full-on genius. this means that i am, in reality, a full-on genius, and henceforth expect to be treated as such.


Captain Smack said...

1. I'm just one person, but I thought of you as witty and brilliant probably 4 or 5 different times yesterday (I was snooping through the archives). Does that just count as 1?

2. Why "housekeeping"? I'm not connecting the dots. Are there dots?

3. My mom just went to Vegas. She said it was very windy. Just thought I'd warn you.

helen said...

1. i think we can count it as a compromised 3.

2. just addressing various issues. no real dots. just mental? blogular? housekeeping.

3. i'll bring a riot shield, thank you for the warning.

Will said...

People mostly find my blog by searching for donkey sex

Erica AP said...

1. How come

2. everyone comments

3. with numbers? I

4. know I'm new to

5. your blog, but still??

helen said...

1. i blame

2. captain smack

3. i was just

4. following

5. suit.

6. (welcome!)

Captain Smack said...

The reasons I do it are:

1. It keeps things organized, making it easier to follow.

2. It maximizes the chances of getting each question addressed.

3. Tomatoes generally aren't ripe this time of year.

I know that last one doesn't fit, but I like for things to be in groups of three.

Captain Smack said...

Also, you're not doing it right. You don't just go sticking a number in any ol' place you want, all willy-nilly. Each number should represent one specific item.


Matt Carman said...

I hear someone like you can make pretty good money in Vegas.

I was referring to your skills as a unionized audiovisual events technician. Not, you know, your a and tees.

ploop said...

1. you
2. are
3. a
4. genius

You are wonderful and I can't wait for my readers to discover you. For the Bono post alone I'm happy to call you a genius!

Marcin said...

It's clear that you would make a good hustler, shyster, or mock-auctioneer, based on your consumating hustling. Good show!

RW said...

Just happened onto your blog - uh - quite by accident and am SO very glad to have found you! I have read millions... no... BILLIONS of blogs in my day (hack, wheeze) and I must say you - my good woman - are a bloody GENIUS! Har!

But... you should have a wider readership - that I'm not kidding about.

Erica AP said...

1. Thank you for the lesson

2. It is greatly appreciated

3. I have nothing to write for #3 but captain smack said I have to do it in 3's...

Celia said...

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Greg said...

I don't even remember how I got to this blog... (maybe from One Thing I Hate About Today)... but I like it! Keep up the good work!!

annie said...

Hey, see there! I've come recommended. RW will vouch for me, too (probably that I'm not at all intellectual and quite possibly an idiot, but I know a good blog when I see it. Yours is great.)

-j. said...

I agree with celia. Keep it, and show us more!