what i had for lunch

the following conversation, more or less, occurred recently:

friend of helen: you should blog more.
helen: no thank you.
foh: why not?
h: i have nothing interesting to say right now. and my strict code of blogging ethics means that if i don't have anything interesting to say, or a noninteresting thing to say but an interesting way in which to say it, or a noninteresting thing to say and a noninteresting way to say it but an unshakeable obsession with the thing despite its eveident lack of interestingness, i don't blog about it. people don't want to know what i had for lunch. in fact, no one cares.*
foh: i would care a little.

i have nothing interesting to say. even if i blogged about my personal life, i would have nothing interesting to say, because my personal life is sort of chugging along at this nice pace of enjoyable-yet-boring, which is actually pretty great.

but you know what? my random friend cares about what i had for lunch. and i consider myself equivalent to a congressperson, in the sense that i view one constituent communication as indicative of the governance preferences of approximately 20,000 constituents. so 20,000 of you will find the following sentence really really really fascinating, and i expect there to be rejoicing of the much variety. are you ready?

raw string beans
baby carrots
a cup of chicken-orzo soup
a dinner roll

you just wait until tomorrow. on fridays i go wild.

*i speak in hypertext, fyi.


Marcin said...

In that case, I demand that you have better lunches. Seriously, even I do, and I pop out to the supermarket. During which time I saw - I'm pretty sure of this - Norman Tebbit (or, some other high ranking Tory of the past, whose face I recognise as a high ranking Tory face of the past), making a purchase whilst clutching a 2001 Who's Who to his chest.

Anyway, my lunch was a pickled herring nigiri, a spicy beef wrap (featuring cheese), a slice of chocolate tart, and a preserved fruit pastry. I am so much better than you at lunch.

a lady said...

you posted!

I don't remember having lunch. I think there may have been chocolate-covered cranberries happening at some point in my day?

anyway, for dinner, I just gorged on beef chop suey. how deliciously retro! you say. well, yes. also, how gross: I ate the whole thing. sigh.

Captain Smack said...


RW said...

You obviously need some tall, dark spinach to sweep you off your feet.

Anonymous said...

this isn't really specific enough for me, helen. i want to know how many baby carrots you ate. also: chicken orzo soup sounds delicious, but that's probably because it is raining in boston right now.

Fish said...

I have ham sandwiches and a big slice of guilt pie from the kosher police. Much rejoicing!